


Maybe I'm in Love (And Maybe it's Starting to Tell)

by phonecallfromgod



Category: Dead Poets Society (1989)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Multi, Nonbinary Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-31
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-04 14:30:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3071609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phonecallfromgod/pseuds/phonecallfromgod
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charlie Dalton tries valiantly to pretend he's not in love with his tutor. Because he totally isn't. Probably. There's also way too many breadsticks, the mitochondria, a weird guy at Coachella and a Non Denominational Winter Solstice Holiday Dance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Maybe I'm in Love (And Maybe it's Starting to Tell)

**Author's Note:**

> A DPS Secret Santa Gift for the lovely Pearl (laugh-hayden-laugh). I had a ridiculously fun time writing this so I really hope you love it and Happy New Year! Shout out to Momo (dontchasethesheep) for organizing all of this and Rachel (nonbinarycharliedalton) for being the best beta/cheerleader/datefriend in the world.

* * *

If anyone asked it was all Todd Anderson’s fault. No really. If Neil hadn’t started dating Todd he  wouldn’t have jumped ship on Charlie and left him partnerless in all of his classes.

And without someone who was willing to do at least 65% of the work- well okay maybe more like 85% -and who didn’t let Charlie copy their homework, he suddenly found himself failing half of his classes and forced into getting a tutor.

 

“We don’t like to call them tutors,” Keating says, “That sets up a negative dynamic. I’d prefer if you think of them as a partner in learning, a colleague. A peer academic.”

“What exactly is the difference between a ‘partner in learning and a tutor’” Charlie asks, trying in vain not to fall off the yoga ball Keating had offered him instead of a chair.

“Uh,” Keating says. “Good vibes?”

“Right.” Charlie says.

 

“I can just tell I’m going to get someone awful too.” Charlie whines to Neil and Todd. He was ignoring them for causing this whole mess in the first place, but they’re the only two people left at the lunch table when he returns from Keating’s office.

“Maybe this is karmatic justice for all of those group projects I did by myself.” Neil says, completely unsympathetic, the bastard.

“I did stuff!” Charlie protests, “I mean I did like...some stuff.”

Neil just rolls his eyes, “See this is why you’re a million times better as a project partner.” He says to Todd.

“So that’s why you keep me around.” Todd deadpans.

“Don’t be meeeaaaaan,” Neil whines, “You know you’re greatest.”

Todd exhales sharply, as if to say ‘yeah right’, but he’s smiling so hard it sort of ruins the effect. Charlie can just tell they’re holding hands under the table.

Traitors the both of them.

 

So it’s Steven Meeks.

Which isn’t the worst or anything, it’s sort of the beige paint of options.

It could have been one of those student council bootlicker kids who’ll do just about anything if they think it’ll look good on their college apps.

Though he could probably have done better, he knows Gerard does this whole ~partners in learning~ thing out of the goodness of his heart. Charlie likes to imagine the whole thing would probably have ended with them smoking hydroponic weed in his basement and making cupcakes.

He has no fucking clue what to expect from Steven Meeks because he doesn’t even really know him, or rather he doesn’t _know_ Steven Meeks.

It’s like how he knows the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell but fuck if he knows what that actually means.

 

“Maybe you should cut down on smoking weed with Gerard.” Ginny says when he explains his mitochondria theory to her.

“You’ll understand when you’re older.”

Ginny rolls her eyes, “I’m two months older than you.”

“Well yeah, numerically. But I have an old soul, some guy at Coachella said so and everything.”

“This is exactly why you need to spend less time with Gerard.”

 

“Now I know you’re both probably thinking you’re ‘too cool’ for this whole partners in learning.” Keating says. “But I think this could be a tremendous opportunity for both of you, as _human beings_.”

He’s ditched the yoga balls today so they’re sitting on his dirty office floor because somehow Keating thinks that’s zen or will help them all be best buddies or something.

“Maybe we should talk about any concerns or fears you two have about this partnership.”

Steven looks over at Charlie and hesitantly raises his hand, “Um, shouldn’t we be studying or something?”

Keating shakes his head, “Ahhh Mr. Meeks but we are studying something, the human spirit.”

“Um, okay.”

“I have a concern.” Charlie says, “Can we not sit on the floor? I’m wearing white pants.”

“Yes! Let us stand up.” Keating says, “Stand up so we can face the challenges approaching us like men!”

“I’m nonbinary.” Charlie says.

Keating stares at Charlie for a moment, “Well, either way, let’s start with some trust falls shall we.”

 

Steven shows up to their first actual study session with snacks. Like actual proper homemade brownies, and Charlie immediately feels guilty for thinking of him as beige paint.

“I think that trip to India was the worst thing to ever happen to Keating.” Steven says, “I have bruises on my ass from him dropping me. What exactly was that supposed to teach me about being a good tutor?”

Charlie’s too caught up thinking about Steven’s ass to come up with any clever remark, and where the hell had _that_ come from? It’s true that Steven was much cuter up close. His floppy ginger hair and freckles and weirdly shaped but somehow attractive mouth.

Not that Charlie would ever actually go for him; he was much too uptight for his tastes. Charlie prefers guys who are romantic and idealistic and have brown hair and are maybe sometimes named Neil.

Okay shut up it was like two years ago and he’s totally mostly almost over it.

Probably.

Well either way it didn’t exactly hurt that his tutor was a little bit of a cutie. Gives him something nicer to look at than latin roots (It’s 2014 why the fuck does he need to know latin anyway?).

Steven is looking at him and Charlie realizes he’s been staring at Steven without responding to his question.

“Uh….” He says, panicking before grabbing a brownie and shoving it in his mouth.

“Maybe we should try some trig instead.” Steven says.

Smooth move Dalton.

 

“You cannot write your paper on how capitalism is destroying memes.” Steven says a week and a half in.

Charlie pouts. “I know you think that makes you look cute but you just look constipated,” Steven says rolling his eyes, “C’mon was that seriously your only idea?”

“Uh yeah because it was golden and genius. Are you honestly telling me that capitalism _isn’t_ destroying meme culture?”

“Oh it definitely is,” Steven says earnestly.

“So what’s the problem.”

“Well I don’t see that that has anything to do with _Romeo and Juliet_.” Steven says logically.

Charlie falters.

“Well that’s not _my_ fault now is it.”

Steven laughs, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

Charlie tries very hard to remember how to breathe.

Seasonal allergies probably.

In December.

Right.

 

Neil is talking about….something. He is talking about something and Charlie is not listening. Because how the hell is he supposed to focus on whatever the hell Neil is blathering on about when Steven is sitting two tables away with Richard Cameron.

He’s eating a salad and that is inexplicably adorable, clearly arguing with Cameron about something and jabbing enthusiastically in the air with his fork. The bright white of the snow outside makes him look back lit and his perfect ginger curls are fucking glowing.

Even the school mandated white button-up and grey cardigan combo is somehow appealing on him.

Oh no.

This is not good.

This is very very very not good.

“-So anyway I asked around but no one seems to have any idea where I could even get one so I guess I’m back to the drawing board and-” Charlie lunges across the table and grabs Neil by the shoulders cutting off his (probably boring lets be honest) little speech.

“I HAVE A PROBLEM.”

“Yeah I’ll fucking say,” Neil says, shaking Charlie’s hands off of him, “What the hell.”

“This is _important_.”

“Uh, yeah so was what I was saying.”

“Was it _really_?” Charlie challenges, though he still has no clue what Neil was even talking about. Something about Todd probably.

Neil frowns at him, he is not an attractive frowner. Now Steven on the other hand he gets this little crease right between his eyebrows and sometimes he’d get a little red and splotchy and-

Fuck. Fuck, Fuckity fuck from fuck junction.

Steven is now looking over from his table, fork poised midair. His eyebrows crinkle and the little crease makes a guest appearance. Charlie can feel his heart making a valiant effort to crash through his ribcage.

“ _Are you okay_?” Steven mouths at him. He looks worried.

God bless his ginger soul.

Charlie manages a weak smile and a wave and Steven goes back to his salad.

Neil is looking wide-eyed at Charlie, glancing over to Steven’s table and then back to Charlie.

“Shit son.”

“I knoooooowwwww.” Charlie moans into the table.

 

It’s decided.

He’s just going to ignore it until it goes away. It (mostly) worked for his Neil problem and that weird thing on his foot.

Though this is considerably more easily said than done since he has to spend two hours pressed up beside Steven every single day after school.

Well okay maybe being pressed up against him wasn’t mandatory but it’s not like it was discouraged either.

The worst part of it all too was that as a tutor Steven was kind of perfect.

Sure he had beautiful eyelashes and a plush bottom lip that he had a bad habit of biting while writing down formulas but he also fucking knew his shit and  put up with zero of Charlie’s bullshit.

He’s fucking _perfect_.

Charlie is so fucked.

 

“Why are you so obsessed with pretending like you don’t have feelings?” Gerard says, “You need to get this out of your system, I can’t stand another minute of hearing about Steven Meeks’ trapezoid shaped mouth.”

“Okay but you have to admit it is really nice looking.”

“Uh no,” Gerard says, “I absolutely don’t have to do that at all.”

Charlie sighs. He’s flat on his back, legs going up the wall of Gerard’s gross faux-wood panelled basement. Normally he’d be high by now but Gerard has cut him off, claiming it makes his pining worse.

Okay for the record he is not fucking pinning.

And even if he was a little, it’d be totally justified. Have you seen Steven’s eyes when the light hits them?

“Do you know what the best thing about Steven is though?”

Gerard sighs like his life is very difficult, “What? His freckles?”

“He doesn’t treat me like I’m a problem that needs to be solved, you know? Like when Neil and I were...whatever, he always acted like he wanted to fix all my problems. He still kind of does honestly.”

“I am much too sober to listen to your continuing Neil drama.” Gerard says.

“Okay but it’s not Neil drama cause like, he was clearly wrong for me and maybe Steven is right for me but maybe I’m not right for him so I should just leave him alone.”

Gerard doesn’t say anything.

“Right? I should just leave him alone.” Gerard still doesn’t reply and Charlie flips over irritably.

Gerard’s looking at Charlie’s phone like it’s going to bite him.

“What is it?” Charlie says knees cracking loudly as he gets up.

“You have two missed calls and four texts from Steven Meeks.” Gerard says.

Charlie’s body jolts involuntarily and he lunges toward his phone and ends up tripping over the coffee table and landing with a thunk on his ass.

“Oh my god!” He cries from the floor, “He wants me to come to his house!”

Gerard looms over him shaking his head, “Allos I swear to god.”

 

Steven’s house is a weird pseudo-Californian one-level that would have been considered extravagantly large in the 90s. Charlie debates whether he should knock or just text Steven that he’s there.

He’s suddenly struck with panic that he should have brought something, even though it’s not like he’s there because he wants to be, and it’s not really close enough to Christmas to warrant a random present.

Besides, he’s like 85% sure Steven is Jewish.

“I didn’t bring you a gift.” Charlie blurts when Steven appears on the doorstep.

“Um, that’s okay.” He says, Charlie never seen him out of his uniform before, and oh god he’s even cuter in a pair of surprisingly slim jeans and a red cardigan with some sort of weird white pattern.

“Are those dreidels?”

“Oh, uh yeah.” Steven says looking down. “My mom gave it to me.”

Oh god he’s blushing. Charlie’s going to faint.

“Did you want to come in?” He pulls the door wider so Charlie can step inside.

It’s surprisingly cozy on the inside with a sunken living room housing a large fireplace and a Christmas tree?

Charlie looks between Steven’s sweater and the tree. “Are you?”

“I’m half and half yeah. My mom’s Reform and then my other mom is Roman Catholic. You have no idea how many candles we go through.”

“You have two moms?”

Steven blinks at him, “I thought everyone knew that.  Did you never hear about the time Hopkins said my mom was gay and I asked which one?”

“I just assumed that was an urban legend. Like the one about the meatloaf having pudding in it.”

“To be fair I think that one might be true too.”

 

They stop going to the library.

Charlie tells Steven he can focus better without all the distractions.

Which is technically true, but it isn’t his homework he’s worried about focusing on.

“Don’t you have anything to _do_?” Steven asks, he’s got a history paper due tomorrow and he’s stressed about.

Honestly if it were Charlie’s project he wouldn’t have even started yet.

 _he’s so motivated <3 <3 <3_ He texts to Gerard.

“I can’t leave until you tell me if this is right.” Charlie whines flapping around his page of trig homework.  

There’s a knock at the door and a woman pokes her head in. “Hey honey I know you're busy. Mom has to stay late so I’m going to make us a pizza later.”

She notices Charlie on the bed and he wishes he hadn’t picked today to wear his ‘totes amaze’ sweater.

“Oh you must be Charlie. I’m Julia. Steven talks about you all the time but I never thought I’d actually get to meet you!” She glances affectionately at Steven. “Did you two want any snacks or anything?

“Alright yes thank you mother, we’re fine.” Steven says.

Is he...embarrassed?

“Okay, okay. Have fun. Let me know if you need anything sweetie.” She closes the door with a click behind her.

“That’s you mom?” Charlie asks, voice pitched a little lower than usual.

“One of them, yeah. Why?” Steven says distractedly. He doesn’t look up from his laptop or even stop typing which is frankly impressive.

Charlie shrugs settling back onto Steven’s bed, “She’s just kinda, you know-”

“Korean?” Steven suggests bluntly.

“What? No! I mean, well yeah, but I was going to say she’s kind of a hot mom.”

He doesn’t turn around but Charlie can see him make a face in the reflection of his computer monitor.

Charlie can’t resist, “Is your other one hot too?”

Steven throws a pillow at him.

 

It doesn’t feel like Steven is tutoring him anymore.

Mostly it just feels like they’re hanging out together at Steven’s house. Charlie flopped on the bed reading a comic while Steven goes over his english essay.  

Memes rejected, Charlie has decided to write about the genderfluidity of Mercutio, cause seriously what a fucking nonbinary loser.

“Can I ask you something?” Steven says.

“Hmmm?”

“So you’re nonbinary right? And you use he pronouns.”

Charlie sits up, “Uh yeah. I mean I’ve tried out other pronouns, but I just feel, idk there’s not really anything gendered about ‘he’ other than cultural stuff, you know?”

Steven thinks about this moment. “Yeah that makes sense.”

“Mostly I just hate getting called like a guy or a boy or a man or whatever. Like fuck that. Don’t ever call me your boyfriend.”

It’s out of his mouth before he can even think.

“Why would I call you my boyfriend?” Steven asks.

“Uh you wouldn’t.” Charlie says. “I just meant like...hypothetically...maybe you would call me a boy and also we would be friends and thus your boyfriend. But I’m not.”

“Alright.” Steven says sounding skeptical.

“Wow look at that time I really have to be going now.” Charlie says hurriedly shoving his stuff into his bag. “I’ll show myself out thanks!”

Dalton you fucking moldy crouton.

 

“You should just ask him out.” Neil says.

Charlie’s camped himself out in the Olive Garden where Neil works and has decided to drown his sorrows in breadsticks.

As usual he is being completely unhelpful.

“Oh okay, I’ll just pop over to the alternate universe where I didn’t just make a complete ass of myself and ask that Steven.”

“It wasn’t that bad.” Neil says.

“You weren’t there.” Charlie moans.

He’s decided, he’s just going to stay in this booth forever and live off of breadsticks until he dies.

Which is probably about 7 minutes from now.

“Todd thinks you should ask him out too.” Neil says looking up from his phone. “He also thinks it’s nice that someone managed to melt your ice cold heart.”

Charlie glares up at him through his fringe.   
“Maybe I should have left that bit out.”  Neil mumbles and makes some excuse about having to go ‘serve tables’ and ‘do his job’ and ‘not get fired’.

“You know,” Neil says, sliding into the booth and waking Charlie from a carb induced stupor an indefinite amount of time later. “If you weren’t such a weenie and did want to actually ask him out you could always just ask him to the dance. If it doesn’t work out it’s not a big deal and you can say it wasn’t actually a date. But if it does then it totally counts!”

“What dance, what are you even talking about?”

“The Non Denominational Winter Solstice Holiday Dance.” Neil says.

Charlie looks at him blankly.

“It’s literally tomorrow.”

“What?”

“There are posters all over the school and there have been announcements for three weeks. How do you not know these things? Have you just been drowning out everything not Steven Meeks related for the last three weeks?”

“I don-” Charlie starts then hesitates.

“Okay that’s it, you’re cut off.” Neil says, stealing the basket of breadsticks off the table. “Get your freaking act together. It’s just getting sad.”

Traitor.

 

How he manages to face Steven the next day is nothing short of a miracle.

But since he forgot his essay, if he has any hope of passing English at all this semester he’s going to need it.

Steven is at his locker chatting with Richard Cameron who glares at him when he sees Charlie approaching.

What the hell is his deal anyways?

“Oh hey!” Steven says brightly when he catches sight of him, “I have your essay. Charlie it’s honestly amazing, you did a really good job.”

Cameron huffs and rolls his eyes, “I have to go be not here.”

“What’s his deal.”

“He’s never forgiven you for that time in sixth grade you told everyone Dick was short for Richard.” Steven says shrugging.

“So,” Charlie says, “I guess this is probably our last day of “peer supported learning” or whatever the hell Keating’s calling it this week.”

“Yeah I guess it is. I’m going to miss it actually it was kind of fun. You’re not nearly as much of an asshole as I expected.” Steven says jokingly, shoving him with his shoulder, and he either sounds a little sad or Charlie is reading way way way too much into it.

“Hey so, did you hear about that dance tonight?”

“Oh yeah, Gerard was telling me about it, the Non Denominational Winter Solstice Holiday Dance. I appreciate the exclusivity but you think they could have shortened that just a little bit.”

Charlie can barely hear him his heart is pounding so hard. “Ha ha yeah.”

“Are you okay?” Steven asks, he reaches out for him and Charlie flinches.

“Yeah I’m _great_.”

Oh god is he sweating? Gross.

“Are you sure cause you look like you’re going to hurl.”

Charlie takes a deep breath.

Be brave you goddamn moldy crouton.

“Okay I’m just going to say this because everyone said I should. And I really really didn’t want to do this stupid tutoring thing and it’s all Todd’s fault anyways and you were the Mitochondria and  I thought you were going to be like beige paint and boring as fuck but I am actually so so glad I was forced into spending time with you.”

Charlie pauses for breath because he’s honestly worried he’s going to pass out before he can ask Steven out.

Then he sees Steven’s face.

He doesn’t look happy or flattered or excited or hopelessly deeply head over heels like Charlie had hoped.

He looks really pissed.

“Wow, okay. Fuck you.” Steven says.

“What? No, you’re not supposed to be mad!”

Well that was _definitely_ not the right thing to say.

“Don’t tell me how to feel! You can piss right the hell off Charlie Dalton cause you’re a fucking asshole.”

Steven slams his locker shut and storms off.

He’s in shock honestly, and then it starts to fade into absolute self-loathing.

What the fuck was he thinking?

Steven Meeks was also absolutely not the kind of guy who would go for someone like Charlie and he was deluding himself thinking otherwise.

Charlie tends to attract people who want to date him to piss of their fathers.

Steven doesn’t even _have_ a father.

 

After what’d happened going to the Non Denominational Winter Holiday Dance is basically the last thing Charlie wants to do.

But his friends seem to think “No” means “Absolutely!”  and “Fuck off” means “Please forcibly drag me to this social event!”

Though Charlie did have to admit that getting all dressed up had made him feel marginally better.

The happy couples on the other hand. Not so much.

“You guys remember my girlfriend Chris and her girlfriend Ginny right?” Knox says, sandwiched between the two of them.

“Where’s Steven!? Knox said you asked him to come!” Chris shouts over the music, she’s wearing a short poofy pink dress that’s absolutely covered in gold glitter and on anyone else it would probably look ridiculous, but, as usual, she looks like an absolute dream.

“I tried to ask him, but I don’t think he’s coming.” Charlie shouts back.

“Did you fuck it up?” Ginny asks, arms crossed over her gold dress. They must have coordinated, because Knox is wearing a gold tie, and isn’t that just fucking cute.

“Wait what happened?” Gerard shouts right as the music fades out and several people turn to look at them.

“I don’t even know!” Charlie says, “I just just trying to tell him how much I liked spending time with him and I was going to ask him out but then he got mad and left.”

Chris looks up from her phone, “Richard Cameron says you said he was boring and that you only spent time with him because you were forced to.”

Gerard looks at him like he just kicked a puppy.

“You _what_!?”

“I didn’t say that! I mean...I kind of did say that but I didn’t say it...like that.”

Ginny just shakes her head at him. “Unbelievable. A guy who is both incredibly smart and incredibly cute might maybe like you and you blow it.”

Chris elbows her, “Don’t be mean. It wasn’t on purpose.”

“That doesn’t make it better.” She tosses her hair, “This is boring. Baby I wanna dance, let’s dance.”

Chris frowns, “I’m not sure.”

“I’ll be fine.” Charlie says, it’s unconvincing as hell.

“Really?” She asks.

“Not really, but I heard Hopkins snuck a flask in so I can probably be fine in about ten minutes if he’s feeling generous.”

Knox puts one arm around Ginny and one arm around Chris. “See he’s great! Let’s go dance.”

“I guess it’s just you and me then, huh Gerard.”

He looks around but Gerard has disappeared.

God he lost a dude who’s 6’4” what the hell else can he fuck up today.

 

Hopkins is a no go.

Who the hell brings a flask full of wine coolers and then refuses to share? What a dick.

Charlie mopes around the darkened empty hallways for a while. It’s all very 1950s horror movie aesthetic

Honestly it’s going to be fine. So he fucked it up with Steven. So he’d let himself get close to someone and got burnt for it.

It would hurt until it didn’t and he would move on.

Right?

His phone buzzes.

Neil has texted him, _Where r u??? u cant leave yet were doing ambrosia!_

Charlie’s guessing that the ambrosia thing is either a weird autocorrect or possibly a dessert of some kind.

 

They’re playing Shake it Off for the 4th time when Charlie gets back to the gym. He catches sight of Chris leaned up against the punch table staring off at Knox and Ginny who are doing what could probably be loosely considered dancing.

It mostly involves Knox picking up Ginny from the waist and spinning her around while she laughs and hangs on for dear life. They look so happy.

“My boyfriend and girlfriend are falling for each other.” Chris says, “It’s like the best Christmas present ever.” There are actual tears in her eyes and Charlie swallows down a bitter shot of envy.

The music dies down and Neil climbs onto the little makeshift platform in front of the DJ table. “Alright, who’s having a good time!”

There’s a smattering of sympathetic cheering and applause. “Okay, I know everyone wants to get back to dancing, but first we need to announce the Non Denominational Winter Solstice Holiday Dance Ambassadors!”

“Try saying that ten times fast.” Ginny says.

“Alright drumroll please.” Neil says, “From Henley Hall….the lovely Miss Chris Noel!”

Both Knox and Ginny start shrieking beside him.

“That’s my baby! That’s my baby!” Ginny shouts jumping up and down in her tiny heels as Chris climbs onto the tiny stage.

Neil drapes her with a sash that just says ‘NDWSHDA’ and a weird tiara made of snowflakes. Unsurprisingly you can’t cram Non Denominational Winter Solstice Holiday Dance Ambassador on a sash.

Knox is sobbing with joy and taking photos.

Neil gets back on the mic “And from Welton Academy...Charlie Dalton!”

Oh. That’s him.

He looks over at Knox, “Wait, what?”

Knox gives him a shove, “You won!”

“But I didn’t do anything!”

Charlie barely squeezes onto the tiny platform while Neil gives him his own sash and crown.

“Speech!” Knox yells and is soon echoed by Ginny.

Neil looks at him panicked, and Charlie just shrugs, “Give her the mic, for like 15 seconds, it’s no big deal.”

Chris accepts it with all the grace of the princess she is. “Wow, thank you so so much for this great honour. I couldn’t have done it without the love and support of my lovely girlfriend Ginny and boyfriend Knox, I love you so much!”

There’s some polite applause and Knox and Ginny shrieking, “We love you!!”

She hands the microphone to Charlie, “I don’t want it.” He stage whispers but she forces it into his hands.

“Uh, yeah. Thanks everyone I guess. I didn’t even know this was a thing and now I am that thing.”

A few people laugh and Charlie looks up at just the right time to see Gerard come in through the fire exit.

With Steven.

He’s wearing the same red dreidel cardigan and his hair is extra floppy like he just woke up from a nap.

Charlie’s heart stops and he almost drops the microphone.

“Oh Gerard you beautiful rule-breaking moth” He murmurs.

Deep breath. Don’t fuck it up.

Again,

“I just wanted to tell you all that today I fucked up really badly. I wasn’t thinking and when I thought I was confessing how I felt I was really just being a jerk. So sorry to interrupt your dance but I need to take this chance to try again.”

Steven is staring at him and he’s in hyperfocus, there’s nobody else in the room but them.

“Steven Meeks I think I am in love with you. I think you are the most amazing, charismatic, smart and funny person I have ever met and this list of adjectives cannot do justice to how wonderful you are. These three weeks have been amazing and if you could deal with putting up with me for a little bit longer I would love to go out with you. Right now actually, if you’re not too busy.”

Steven’s nodding. Oh god he’s fucking nodding and Charlie’s off the stage and shoving the microphone at Neil and they’re playing _Chasing Cars_ and Charlie would complain that it’s so middle school but he doesn’t even care.

“Hi.” Charlie says.

“I’m sorry.” Steven says and Charlie wants to laugh because who the hell even cares. He’s fucking here in his tacky Hanukkah sweater and crooked glasses and his cheeks are red from the cold and Charlie loves him.

“It doesn’t matter,” Charlie says, “You’re here. You’re here and you’re perfect and-”

Steven grabs him by his jacket lapels and he’s kissing him and it’s so sweet and his trapezoid mouth is _amazing_. He kisses the same way he does everything else, with focus and passion and his mouth is so soft Charlie is going to  _cry._

Steven pulls away and he’s blushing, oh dear god. “Was that okay?”

“I don’t know, I think we need to do it again for science.” Charlie says, hands creeping around Steven’s waist and up his back.

And they’re kissing again and Charlie’s brain goes on the fritz a little.

Because he’s at this fucking absurd dance.

In a Snowflake Crown

With Steven Meeks.

Who is sucking on his tongue.

“I think,” Steven says, his glasses are almost completely tilted to one side, “I think maybe I want _you_ to call me your boyfriend.”

“It’s a goddamn Non Denominational Winter Solstice Holiday Miracle” Charlie says and kisses him again for good measure.

* * *

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> phonecallfromgod.tumblr.com


End file.
